self recovery

4/24/2025

No one else has a say over your reality.

A dear friend said this to me recently. It’s something I’ve known for a long while and have shared it with others in different words. But knowing something is different than being it.

It hit home in my bones, my skin, my cells and every single organ. I felt my Self lock in.

What does it mean to BE this Truth, that no one else has a say over your reality?

I was listening to a podcast and the guest was a codependency expert. They kept saying: when you’re in recovery. This is how I used to think about recovery, that we are recovering from something.

But really, in all types of recovery, whether the subject matter be codependency, alcoholism, drug addiction, sex addiction, perfectionism, people-pleasing or fill-in-the-blank, we are actually recovering something crucial to having power over our own reality and that something is the Self.

We give away the Self (power over our reality) in seemingly innocuous ways.

Four months ago I stopped drinking. It took awhile (years) to arrive at the place of not drinking. It was a natural progression. I began to see that alcohol was interfering in the life I wanted to create. I had reached a point that I could no longer deny this (my Self). And I am not picking on drinking, insert anything that keeps you from your Self.

Recently I went on a side by side ride (UTV) with friends. I saw they had made me a margarita. I left it untouched for awhile, but then eventually drank it. This act of Self-denial was evident in the way I felt afterwards.

I allowed my friends to have power over my reality - over the life that I want to make real. It was not a discussion and I do not blame them. It had nothing to do with them. I know I created this experience to more fully claim my power and to underscore my resolve to not go back to a life of Self-denial and harm.

So how do we do this? BE the Truth of our Self? I know for me that I started giving pieces and parts of my Self away a long time ago. This realization has supported me in reclaiming those pieces and parts in every moment. I am living my way.

And so are you. You got YOU.

xoxo